If it triggers you, be prepared to provide an alternative that wouldn’t.

The scenario is something like this…

The sunroof on the car was left open. I had assumed it was her, she had assumed it was me.

  • Me: I think you left the sunroof open
  • Her: No, it was you.

I didn’t recall.

  • Me: I didn’t, didn’t you drop our kid off?
  • Her: Yes, but then when you got out of the Walgreens and I got in the back seat and it was open.

I still didn’t recall, but that seemed reasonable. So take responsibility

  • Me: Well, it might have been me, I’m sorry.
  • Her: Well if you don’t want to take responsibility, don’t apologize.

Well, I still don’t recall, but I am taking responsibility

  • Me: Well I may well have done it, so I’m apologizing. I can’t recall opening it, but I’m still apologizing.
  • Her: Well I may well accept it. (Note the tone, and reptition of my statement)

So it seems I’m now stuck and can’t either have declare that I remember doing it, or don’t bother apologizing. Feels lose-lose.

  • Me: It may well have been me, I am trying to apologize. It’s clear that my apology isn’t good enough or said in the right way. How would you want me to say it.
  • Her: (With anger and frustration) - your way.

So I’m honestly completeley confused by what to do here. I still can’t recall doing it, but based on the situation, I may well have done it. So I should apologize. That’s fine.

Should I take full and absolute responsibility for something I have no recollection of doing? I’m not sure.


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