On Completing Actions
Context, damn context. When initiating, is it fine to finish?
We have a dog that has an ear infection that will come and go. It’s likely due to his breeding, but it’s persistent I’ve been trying to get the time to take him in to get it both looked at and to get the tablets for him.
Attempt #1
My wife asked if I wanted her to book the dog in, sure - that’s fine. We need to get tablets and we need to get his ear checked out - because it’s getting painful for him again.
So she calls up, and builds a set of assumptions. I had gone to this vet previously for his ear (I had not), I knew what ointment or whatever I needed (I had no idea). She starts explaining that we’ve visitied before for his ear, and I can hear that they are saying they have no record. I try to call out saying it wasn’t them.
She hangs up the phone angrily, “What was the point of asking you me to book it then?”.
My recollection of the ask was “Thanks if you can book an appointment to get his ear looked at and how we can manage it longer term.” That was it, no extra details, no extra context. If asked, I would have provide the background, but less context is apparently better so I asked a simpler, more direct question.
Didn’t work out to well, and she’s angry at me for putting her in that situation.
Attempt #2
The next day, after getting in trouble for setting her up for failure, I assume the dog is now my problem. So I look up their website, and prepare to call. They have a service that allows you to order meds for the dog (heartworm + fleas/ticks). But they will validate the Rx with the Vet.
I entered my details, my phone number, and placed the order. I expected a call once the prescription was requested.
It came in, to her phone. I could hear some questions being asked, and an answer being provided. There were gaps so I said I know what’s going on, can you give me the phone.
After a couple of other questions, the phone was given to me. I clarified the details, and the order was confirmed. After the call, hung up. There was only anger about me forcing the phone from her hand.
The recitation of the call was that they were calling confirming delivery, and they wanted to check a few things so that they could ship it. This was wrong.
I wanted to confirm other details, requirements for using that system. It’s also useful for treating the persistent ear infection which is going to be discussed. Once I get confirmation on what the treatment will be, I will be able to order, coordinate those items.
The last comment was “Well why did you give my phone number?” I hadn’t it was likely on the account for the dog at the Vet. They called the first number, it happened to be her.
What happened?
AITA for wanting to complete the transaction I started. What could I have done different to not piss her off? I did say, “That’s the vet, isn’t? I know what’s going on - can I take the call?”. Is that too little, too rude?
Was I cutting her off? Diminishing her? I’m struggling to see how it is.